Imagine feeling heard, knowing someone was really listening and caring about what you had to say.

I volunteer with kids. I watch them as they bounce around, shouting over each other, hands waving in the air, just to share a thought or an impulse they can’t bear to hold back another second. It’s so natural, our instinct to be heard.

Being listened to is like oxygen. Life just isn’t the same without it. Our cells contract, we gasp and struggle until finally, we can take that deep breath and know with an ahh-haa, we've got the air we need. It’s the same feeling as knowing someone else gets us, that someone sees who we are and is paying attention to what we have to say.

I think of my little nephew, tugging on my sleeve, saying “Auntie Cynthia, Auntie Cynthia, I wanna tell you something”! There’s a thrill in listening to him make up a story, conjuring up heroes, great feats, and colorful surroundings. He tells me, “my sister Abbey and me went to the East Bay and had a picnic with some pirates and we stole their swords and jumped on some really big purple bird and flew all the way home”. He’s four years old and he knows he has something so important to share he can’t even sit still while saying it.

Is there something in you that's jumping up and down to be heard? What are you wanting to express? What would it feel like to have someone listen with curiosity and intent to whatever you have to share? I'd like to know, so I’m offering 30 minutes of free air time to listen to whatever you want to have heard. Do you know that guy on YouTube who goes around giving free hugs? I’m offering something similar–free listening sessions. There's no risk, no judgement, and no obligation. Or try it yourself by taking the time to really listen to someone else. See what you notice. To really hear what someone is saying, it takes being fully present in the moment. And that's just about as much of a gift, as being heard.

Happy Valentine’s Day after! What a great excuse to revel in love. All love, self-love, gay love, straight love, kinky love, friendship love and the universal love y’all, love. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about self-love. And no, I’m not talking about sitting around reading “Shades of Grey” in the bath or what ever else floats your boat in that department. I’m talking about the kind of self-love that wakes you up in the morning feeling excited to see who you get to be with others today. How do you get to experience yourself? What in you is clamoring for expression?

Seems most all of us got “a thing” we carry around like a little piece of stone chaffing at our heart. We were raised in this culture, in this particular time period, where in so many ways, we are still coming out of the dark ages of repression or the negation of self. Thinking about ones own family in the context of the social/historical continuum, it’s no freaking wonder we are challenged in varying degrees to accept ourselves as simply being, okay.  And the bottom of the bottom line of self-love is just that…feeling okay. And maybe even better than okay with who you are in THIS moment. Self-improvement may be a great goal to have, but what about right now?

That’s where the reveling comes in. Taking time to bask in the great after glow of the love fest Valentine’s Day represents (minus the Hallmark cards and romantic delusions). Where love is love and it’s all yours to experience. I picture my sweet pooch, rolling around on his back, totally happy to be his funny little dog self. How good it feels to be a dog! Nothing better than that! Did he have to do anything to deserve feeling loved? Nope, he just had to show up and be a dog. What if we didn’t have to do anything to feel loved besides simply being here?

Imagine celebrating yourself for no good reason other than there is no one else on this planet like you, with your special assortment of cells, experience, personality, gifts and abilities. Truly, there isn’t another one on this entire Earth just like you. What is it about you that makes you so uniquely you? If you’ve never written a love letter to yourself, I’d encourage you to try it on for size. Now. What would it feel like to leave off the judgments and have your self a little party? To get out the horns and whistles and blow them on your own behalf and revel in the noise you make? Hummm? Might be even better than chocolate. Just saying…